As a coach, I witness daily how powerful questions can ignite a shift, deepen understanding, and foster meaningful change. Recently, a client shared her journey of discovering the transformative power of open-ended questions—not just in her professional life but in her role as a mother to her young son.
When this client, a bright and curious individual, first began her coaching journey, she experienced open-ended questions as a way to explore her own insights and choices more freely. Through practice, she saw how these questions expanded her thinking, allowed her to explore multiple perspectives, and ultimately deepened her self-awareness. But she hadn’t expected that these coaching tools would create a stronger bond with her 2.5-year-old son.
Like many parents, she faced the daily challenge of understanding her child’s experiences at daycare. Her little boy was at that age where he was bubbling with energy, yet his words were still few. Each day, she found herself asking typical questions: “Did you have a good day?” or “Did you have fun today?”. Yet his answers remained short, leaving her with little insight into his world.
Then, one afternoon after a coaching session where she had been exploring open-ended questioning, it struck her:
What if I try using open-ended questions with him?
The idea seemed a little bold—after all, he was only two and a half. But her heart told her to give it a try.
The next day, when he came home, she sat with him at eye level and asked, “What was something fun you did today?”. He paused, as if surprised by the question, and then, after a moment, a small smile spread across his face. He started babbling about a tower he’d built with blocks and how he knocked it over with his friends. She noticed he was animated, excited, and offering more detail than usual.
Encouraged, she began experimenting further.
Each day, she’d ask a different question: “Who did you play with today?” or “What did you see outside?” or “What was something that made you happy?”. Little by little, her son started to open up, sharing not only his activities but also his budding friendships, his favorite games, and even some of the little challenges he faced with other children.
One evening, he shared how he felt sad because he didn’t get a turn on the slide. For the first time, she saw his emotional world unfold before her. That simple revelation led to a conversation about feelings—a challenging topic for a toddler but an essential one. She validated his sadness, letting him know it was okay to feel disappointed, and encouraged him to try taking turns again the next day.
These open-ended questions became more than just a daily ritual; they became a bridge between her and her son’s rapidly growing world. With each new question, he felt seen, heard, and understood. And with each answer, she gained a deeper appreciation for his resilience, his kindness, and his budding personality.
Reflecting on this experience, my client shared, “I never imagined that asking open-ended questions could have such an impact. Coaching has shown me that questions are powerful tools—and as it turns out, they don’t just work in boardrooms and coaching sessions; they work in playrooms, too.”
In the coaching world, we know that open-ended questions are keys that open doors to reflection, growth, and trust.
For my client, they unlocked a new level of connection and understanding with her young son.
Her story serves as a reminder that powerful questions hold no age limits, and that by simply listening, we can learn to see the world through someone else’s eyes—even when that someone is just 2.5 years old.
Through her newfound practice of asking questions, she didn’t just become a more mindful parent; she became her son’s confidante, guide, and most ardent cheerleader. And in the end, she gained more than just answers—she discovered a beautiful, growing connection with her son, rooted in curiosity, respect, and love.
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